February 2012
1 post
“being alone never felt right. sometimes it felt good, but it never felt right.”
– Charles Bukowski (Women)
July 2011
1 post
December 2010
1 post
November 2010
1 post
October 2010
3 posts
I’ve stumbled so many times that it has forced me to rethink what i am made of. my head seems to have the consistency of lead, heavy, always heavy. while my feet have that of helium, too light to stick to the ground.
September 2010
9 posts
…and I’d be surprised if I didn’t know myself quite as well as I do. as with gravity, all decisions bear weight on each other like a house of cards in the autumn winds I only wish to be frozen before I’m broken
no titles
I spend too much time going back and forth between the knife and my life i’m cut, but i’m alive and maybe i’ll wander forever I know it’s not about what you should’ve done but what you’ll remember
Sometimes I get tired of just sitting in my room just listening to my own heartbeat wondering why I can’t man-up and drink that scotch try and fall asleep quicker faster right now…
Always assumed life was somewhere else..
Cause and Effect
the best often die by their own hand just to get away, and those left behind can never quite understand why anybody would ever want to get away from them Charles Bukowski
ever thine ever mine ever ours
April 2010
1 post
“The major problem—one of the major problems, for there are several—one of the...”
– Douglas Adams
March 2010
8 posts
Flight
As a child I knew I could fly and that my world was not just sand, sea and sky.
Something within me wanted to be free of man-made time and man-made destiny.
I somehow knew my body was not me and that my life is part of eternity, but as my body grew accustomed to its toil I became increasingly fettered to the soil, and in man-made time I soon forgot that which I am, and embraced that which I am...
djies bo ta caba trempan mucho trempan anto ami laat mucho laat time divides us it divides us
good weather is like good women- it doesn’t always happen and when it does it doesn’t always last. man is more stable: if he’s bad there’s more chance he’ll stay that way, or if he’s good he might hang on, but a woman is changed by children age diet conversation sex the moon the absence or presence of sun or good times. a woman must be nursed into subsistence ...
A moment of violence
I never did lose a battle, but I’m feeling further from the end of war. Deplored, ignored, and rarely ever self assured. Why does it seem the ones who have everything have nothing inside? nothing inside I don’t sleep anymore, I gave it up, because what we do is not enough, and now they’re calling out our bluffs. Have you done a single thing for someone else? Or do you...
You Are Tired (I Think)
Of the always puzzle of living and doing; And so am I.
Come with me, then, And we’ll leave it far and far away— (Only you and I, understand!)
You have played, (I think) And broke the toys you were fondest of, And are a little tired now; Tired of things that break, and— Just tired. So am I.
But I come with a dream in my eyes tonight, And I knock with a rose at the hopeless gate of your heart—...
WatchVictim of the brain
February 2010
7 posts
Alone With Everybody
the flesh covers the bone and they put a mind in there and sometimes a soul, and the women break vases against the walls and the men drink too much and nobody finds the one but keep looking crawling in and out of beds. flesh covers the bone and the flesh searches for more than flesh. there’s no chance at all: we are all trapped by a singular fate. nobody ever finds the one. the city dumps...
Humanity I Love You
E. E. Cummings
Humanity i love you because you would rather black the boots of success than enquire whose soul dangles from his watch-chain which would be embarrassing for both parties and because you unflinchingly applaud all songs containing the words country home and mother when sung at the old howard Humanity i love you because when you’re hard up you pawn your...
Existentially, truth is where you hang your hat; and that is clearly a lot of responsibility to carry. You can accept responsibility and live accordingly or you can retreat from it, not act, procrastinate, hold out for ultimate truth, and succeed only in defining yourself as a disappointed dream, hope, wish, or expectation.
The world is meaningless, there is no God or gods, there are no morals, the universe is not moving inexorably towards any higher purpose. All meaning is man-made, so make your own, and make it well. Do not treat life as a way to pass the time until you die. Do not try to "find yourself", you must make yourself. Choose what you want to find meaningful and live, create, love, hate, cry,...
January 2010
4 posts
Watch
The Dream I dreamed that you had ceased to love me— not that you had come from other beds back to mine, or gone from mine to others, just that something in your heart had stopped. I willed myself awake to find you still beside me. It was just a dream, I thought, yet when I turned to kiss you, in your eyes I saw that you had ceased to love me. I willed myself awake a second time to find...
December 2009
2 posts
Thinking...
It started out innocently enough. I began to think at parties now and then to loosen up. Inevitably though, one thought led to another, and soon I was more than just a social thinker.
I began to think alone —”to relax,” I told myself — but I knew it wasn’t true. Thinking became more and more important to me, and finally I was thinking all the time.
I began to think on the job. I knew that...
October 2009
3 posts
September 2009
6 posts
Watch
The stars are not wanted now: put out every one; Pack up the moon and dismantle the sun; Pour away the ocean and sweep up the wood. For nothing now can ever come to any good…
WatchAtleast I’m not crazy :D
August 2009
7 posts
Tonight I can write the saddest lines
Tonight I can write the saddest lines.
Write, for example,’The night is shattered and the blue stars shiver in the distance.’ The night wind revolves in the sky and sings. Tonight I can write the saddest lines. I loved her, and sometimes she loved me too. Through nights like this one I held her in my arms I kissed her again and again under the endless sky. She loved me sometimes,...